Travel

It has been a hectic couple of weeks, but we were so happy to see our family and friends. Sonia has an awful lot of loving admirers. I will try to post some of the amazing photos people took when I get them.

During our road trips, first to Dallas and then to Denver and Longmont, Sonia started clasping her hands together and putting them in her mouth. Sometimes she just holds up her hand and studies it, completely ignoring the toy I might be dangling in front of her. This new development came at a perfect time. She started getting a lot more sleep in her right eye without any redness which is classic for a blocked tear duct. Usually these clear up on their own, but in the meantime the poor baby has a messy, goopy eye. Really, I think this is harder on us then it is on Sonia, but now she can rub her eye with her little fist. I try to let her do it, but sometimes I just have to clean the goo. She is not a fan. She fusses when I do it, then lifts her fist to her mouth.

In addition to rubbing her eyes and her mouth, she is holding up her head. She can keep it pretty steady for a good half hour. This picture is from August 15th when we went to see my friend Jessica and her baby, Clyde who is about 3 months older than Sonia. Clyde is sure a charmer, and so active! Jessica and I were marveling at how far babies come in such a short time. In another 4 months or so, Sonia will probably be rolling, sitting, holding her head up all the time.

In the past few weeks, the stars have aligned to let Sonia sleep for 5-6 hours in a row at night. Ahhh... At this point I would not call it her routine, but it sure was nice. Sonia is not one for routines anyway. She does go to bed around nine every night, but she wakes up for the first time anywhere between eleven and three. Some mornings she eats every three hours, sometimes it is every forty five minutes. I remember someone in the NICU telling me that at least she would be on a schedule when she got home, but keeping that feeding-every-three-hour schedule in the NICU sometimes meant waiting to feed her when she was rooting and fussing like crazy and not changing her when we heard her poop an hour before it was time to eat. I felt like I was betraying her trust. I can see enforcing a schedule a bit later when we can distract her and talk to her more. Spoiling? Naw, we just want her to know she can trust us.

Road trip

I am sitting in the back of the car now with Donia, driving back from Dallas. Sonia is sleeping, which is her favorite road trip past time. I am using up my battery and now realizing I am losing my signal. Later...

Fussbudget

As they say, it is a good thing babies are so darn cute. Sometimes cute little Sonia gets some pretty blood-curdling wails going, usually in the afternoon and evening. This is colic. We are lucky because even though she gets awfully upset, we can always find or do something to soothe her. We use a pacifier a lot during these times, which works wonders. Although she used it occasionally in the NICU, I rediscovered the pacifier after spending about two hours one evening trying to nurse her. She would nurse for about five seconds then start screaming, then nurse again, then scream. Finally, I put the pacifier in and like magic, she calmed. It was like, "Whew, at last something that does not squirt milk." Dancing, with a lot of bouncing, is also a good remedy. Alan is her favorite bouncer. Hats off to all the single parents out there because I cannot imagine how difficult it is not to have a partner to take turns with a fretful baby.




Much of the time, she is not fretting. She stays awake more these days and likes to lie on the floor and move her arms and legs. Her limbs are a bit jumpy, so her movements are in little spurts. Adults are de facto stationary creatures, but babies are unconsciously in motion. She will lay there in endless motion until she either falls asleep or something surprises her. When she is surprised, her eyes get big, her hands splay and go to her chest, and her legs extend down. Often, her lips purse as well, somewhat like the picture below, taken with her Grandma Tammy in June.



While she is squirming, she is often smiling. She had great fun at her Grandma Tammy and Grandpa Jeff's house last night. We put her on the ground (on a blanket) while the four of us looked down at her. Wiggle, wiggle, smile, smile. She could not decide who to smile at first! We must have watched her for over half an hour. I feel such a deep connection to her, such love, when she looks into my eyes and grins. I want to tell her: even if you cry all night, honey, I will hold you in my arms and keep you safe and warm.

I love taking pictures of Sonia.

By Hand

The photo above is Sonia surrounded by all the soft, cushy things people made for her. I really did not expect to get even one. I have never been able to stitch or knit more than a square so even attempting one of these projects, let alone completing it, is pretty impressive to me. Babies just inspire generosity and love. I took the picture in part because it is so awesome to see it all at once and in part to show Sonia when she is older. Do not, however, feel guilty if you did not contribute a craft; we all give in different ways.

I have been trying to get pictures of Sonia smiling. When she smiles, they are beautiful, but brief, moments of light. Usually, I do not have the camera handy. If I do, she stops smiling by the time I get it together to shoot. I think the best one is below, though her eyes are smiling more than her mouth.

Now the fun begins. Alan and I make sounds and ooogling faces at her whenever we think she is in the smiling mood. Oddly, the time she is mostly likely to smile seems to be just before or after she cries. It makes me think of a time a few days after I had her. Jeff and Tammy had brought dinner to the hospital for Alan and I. I started to giggle at a story and found I could not stop. Then, I started to cry and found I could not stop that either. It was like laughing opened the emotion gate and everything came tumbling out. I felt much better afterwards.